Single Work at Home Moms

Real issues for Single Moms

Being mom and dad:

It is very hard to be mom and dad and keep the roof over your head and food on the table. It is constant work- remember to take time  for you.

Mom needs time to herself to recharge her batteries, to relax, to spend a few minutes in the shower without someone banging on the door cause someone hit them. LOL.

Seriously, you are no good for you children if you are not taking care of you. And for most single moms, your children are your reason for everything you do.

Get enough sleep, eat a well balanced diet, take your vitamins, take breaks. Trade childcare with another single mom.

 

Depression

Everyone gets the blues sometimes. Single moms have every reason to feel down. We have a lot of responsibility.   When the blues are constant it is time to get help.

Some feelings of sadness last longer and are worse than a simple case of the blues. Depression affects your everyday functioning and depletes your energy and interests. Everything, even just getting out of bed, takes a huge effort when you're dealing with depression. Things that you once enjoyed become tedious and difficult due to depression.

All of your rhythms are disturbed when you have signs of depression.

Physical Signs of Depression

Your behavior can be physical signs of depression:

  • Withdrawal from people, work, pleasures, activities is one of the first signs of depression
  • Spurts of restlessness can be signs of depression
  • Sighing, crying, moaning
  • Difficulty getting out of bed is a sign of depression
  • Lower activity and energy levels
  • Lack of motivation – it's a physical sign of depression when everything feels like an effort

Your feelings can be physical signs of depression:

  • Sadness, misery are "obvious" signs of depression
  • Overwhelmed by everyday tasks (eg, cooking dinner)
  • Numbness or apathy can be a sign of depression
  • Anxiety, tension, irritability
  • Helplessness is a sign of depression
  • Low confidence and poor self-esteem are often signs of depression
  • Disappointment, discouragement, hopelessness
  • Feelings of unattractiveness or ugliness can be signs of depression
  • Loss of pleasure and enjoyment are signs of depression

Your thinking patterns can be physical signs of depression:

  • Inability to make decisions
  • Lack of concentration or focus can be a sign of depression
  • Loss of interest in activities, people, and life
  • Self-criticism, self-blame, self-loathing is often a signs of depression
  • Pessimism can be a sign of depression
  • Preoccupation with problems and failures can be a sign of depressed feelings
  • Thoughts of self-harm or suicide can be signs of depression

Your body signals can be physical signs of depression

  • Fatigue, low energy, exhaustion are often signs of depression
  • Poor sleeping patterns – waking early, not sleeping even when exhausted
  • Loss of appetite or, occasionally, increased appetite can be a physical sign of depression
  • Loss of sexual interest can be a sign of depression

Depression in children

Mental health professionals advise parents to be aware of signs of depression in their children. And younger and younger children are being diagnosed

 

 

If one or more of these signs of depression persist,

parents should seek help

 

Frequent sadness, tearfulness, crying

Teens may show their pervasive sadness by wearing black clothes, writing poetry with morbid themes, or having a preoccupation with music that has nihilistic themes.  Wearing all black does not mean your child is depressed. They may cry for no apparent reason.

 

Hopelessness

Teens may feel that life is not worth living or worth the effort to even maintain their appearance or hygiene.  They may believe that a negative situation will never change and be pessimistic about their future.

 

Decreased interest in activities; or inability to enjoy previously favorite activities  

Teens may become apathetic and drop out of clubs, sports, and other activities they once enjoyed.  Not much seems fun anymore to the depressed teen.

 

Persistent boredom; low energy

Lack of motivation and lowered energy level is reflected by missed classes or not going to school.   A drop in grade averages can be equated with loss of concentration and slowed thinking.

 

Social isolation, poor communication

There is a lack of connection with friends and family. Teens may avoid family gatherings and events. Teens who used to spend a lot of time with friends may now spend most of their time alone and without interests. Teens may not share their feelings with others, believing that they are alone in the world and no one is listening to them or even cares about them.

 

Low self esteem and guilt

Teens may assume blame for negative events or circumstances.  They may feel like a failure and have negative views about their competence and self-worth.  They feel as if they are not "good enough."

 

Extreme sensitivity to rejection or failure

Believing that they are unworthy, depressed teens become even more depressed with every supposed rejection or perceived lack of success.

 

Increased irritability, anger, or hostility

Depressed teens are often irritable, taking out most of their anger on their family.  They may attack others by being critical, sarcastic, or abusive.  They may feel they must reject their family before their family rejects them.

 

Difficulty with relationships

Teens may suddenly have no interest in maintaining friendships. They'll stop calling and visiting their friends.

 

Frequent complaints of physical illnesses, such as headaches and stomachaches

Teens may complain about lightheadedness or dizziness, being nauseated, and back pain. Other common complaints include headaches, stomachaches, vomiting, and menstrual problems.

 

Frequent absences from school or poor performance in school

Children and teens who cause trouble at home or at school may actually be depressed but not know it.  Because the child may not always seem sad, parents and teachers may not realize that the behavior problem is a sign of depression.

 

Poor concentration

Teens may have trouble concentrating on schoolwork, following a conversation, or even watching television.

 

A major change in eating and/or sleeping patterns

Sleep disturbance may show up as all-night television watching, difficulty in getting up for school, or sleeping during the day.  Loss of appetite may become anorexia or bulimia.  Eating too much may result in weight gain and obesity.

 

Talk of or efforts to run away from home  

Running away is usually a cry for help.  This may be the first time the parents realize that their child has a problem and needs help.

 

Thoughts or expressions of suicide or self-destructive behavior

Teens who are depressed may say they want to be dead or may talk about suicide.  Depressed children and teens are at increased risk for committing suicide.  If a child or teen says, "I want to kill myself," or "I'm going to commit suicide," always take the statement seriously and seek evaluation from a child and adolescent psychiatrist or other mental health professional.  People often feel uncomfortable talking about death.  However, asking whether he or she is depressed or thinking about suicide can be helpful.  Rather than "putting thoughts in the child's head," such a question will provide assurance that somebody cares and will give the young person the chance to talk about problems.

 

Alcohol and Drug Abuse

Depressed teens may abuse alcohol or other drugs as a way to feel better.

 

Self-Injury

Teens who have difficulty talking about their feelings may show their emotional tension, physical discomfort, emotional pain, and low self-esteem with self-injurious behaviors, such as cutting.